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Excuse the Emo, It’s Been A Hard Night

October 8, 2012

a few glossy swipes on the whiteboard
a quick Ctrl + A, Del
done.
meanwhile
i’m still slowly swabbing that old, cloudy blackboard
blinking puffs of chalk dust

* * *
 

how awe-ful
how
shattering

that someone you love
who used to love you
can so easily erase you from their heart

2 Comments leave one →
  1. October 9, 2012 10:26 am

    compassion for self, compassion for self, compassion for self. (also, sending metta.) I’m always fascinated by people who (seem to be able to) make such clean breaks. It’s just not how I can/want to live. But I am sometimes jealous of them.

  2. October 9, 2012 4:52 pm

    It’s just not how I can/want to live. But I am sometimes jealous of them.

    Exactly! But how can these both be true??? I don’t want to force myself not to feel this, but it seems so useful! And genuine! And it’s not like I want them to be hurting because of me. But the disparity seems so huge. I can’t help worrying that it indicates that while I *think* I’m just allowing my own feelings to arise, actually I’m indulging in the feelings in unhelpful ways. Oh, well. Practice. Less comparing. thanks for the reminder of compassion for self. :)

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